Instant Karma Cannot Get Me, by Myself a Living Torch

Instant Karma Cannot Get Me

by Myself a Living Torch

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Full Digital Discography

9

releases

Get all 9 Myself a Living Torch releases available on Bandcamp and save 25%.

Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Mermaid of Marin (Black Sand Beach), (You Come True) In Venus Fur, Instant Karma Cannot Get Me, Show Me a Pearl, Make a Wish, Fear of Velvet, Do Big Men Really Run the World?, Orson Welles, and 1 more. , and , .

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1.	Zodiac Player V1 04:20	lyrics	buy track
Zodiac player plays hopscotch on her knees Pain displayer, she makes me see The beautiful inside the obscene When she says: I don't owe you a straight answer I'm a Capricorn, I'm Aquarius And I will devour you like a Cancer I'm an open door Are you curious enough to come inside? Zodiac player plays trick or treat with fate Shows me her fine line, her love and hate And she becomes my persuader When she says: I don't owe you a straight answer I'm a Capricorn, I'm Aquarius And I will devour you like a Cancer I'm an open door Are you curious enough to come inside? Give me your godspeed Your secrets and keys Glide with me on this frontier It's what I need to become A liberated man I don't owe you a straight answer I'm a Capricorn, I'm a Cancer Aquarius, Sagittarius, nefarious angel whore I'm an open door Are you curious enough to come inside?
2.	Charming the Pants off of Lucy 04:40	lyrics	buy track
She smiles when she eats sushi She wants to talk about sex In the cab it's not that easy In the club it's not that hard She laughs at the tortured singer Says he's a Jesus mess But he's one of my favorite singers She says he's just repressed Charming the pants off of Lucy With all the skill of Camus Oh, I'm charming the pants off of Lucy Though I don't know what good it's gonna do me When I barely can keep the blood beneath my skin Two too many in the Orbit Room And we're on the love seat One more in the Cafe du Nord And we're hand in glove Lights dim down to a whisper Use your imagination Lights off and I'm uneasy Lights off and I'm… Charming the pants off of Lucy With all the skill of Camus Oh, I'm charming the pants off of Lucy Though I don't know what good it's gonna do me When I barely can keep the blood beneath my skin On my skin, oh, my skin, on your skin On your skin, on my skin, all over my skin On your skin — When we barely can keep the blood beneath our skin Arch lovers and pale stars Play Misty for me But I know why the wind blows A sweet song for the lonely A sweet song for the lonely… I'm charming the pants off of Lucy With all the skill of Camus Oh, I'm charming the pants off of Lucy Though I don't know what good it's gonna do me When we barely can keep the blood beneath our skin On my skin, oh, my skin, on your skin On your skin, on my skin, all over my skin On your skin — When we barely can keep the blood beneath our skin
3.	Show Me a Pearl 04:23	lyrics	buy track
Instant karma cannot get me I've already been had Don't tell me you feel sorry For the future that I never had 'Cause anymore I don't have the time Anymore I… I want the sacred cow I wanna hear it laugh Bring me the golden egg I want it painted black I'd be less cynical if I knew how Show me a pearl and I'll dive Oh, I'll dive You are eloquent when you lie Your three plus three keep adding up to five I need answers to questions about poverty and hatred But now you don't have the time "I see a line of cars And they're all painted black With flowers and my love [But] never to come back"* I'd be less cynical if I were dead Show me a pearl and I'll dive La la-la, la la-la, la la-la Show me a pearl and I'll dive Now I don't have the time Now I don't have the time Oh, now I don't have the time I want the cleansing rain I wanna feel it fall Bring me the Hindu truth I wanna know it all I'd be less cynical with a million in the bank I'd be less cynical if I knew how Show me a pearl and I'll dive La la-la, la la-la, la la-la Show me a pearl and I'll dive Show me a pearl and I'll dive *Michael Philip Jagger, "Paint It Black"
4.	I'd Print Lots More Money 03:51	lyrics	buy track
If I were a woman I'd run for the presidency If I were a man I'd vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in I've got brave ideas I'd rewrite the laws I've read modern scholars And I've understood them all Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in I'd print lots more money Have rocket rides for kids Make the darkness seem like sunshine I'd print lots more money If I were in office I'd promise the stars If I had the power There'd be Ferris Wheels on Mars We'd all tour the moon Life would be explained Death would not be feared And there'd be no more pain I'd print lots more money Have rocket rides for kids We'd survey the Milky Way To see just where it ends I'd print lots more money I'd print lots more money I had a dream, a flying dream We were all free, we saved the Earth We kissed the clouds, had drinks with Zeus He confessed there was no truth And I fell... I'd print lots more money Have rocket rides for kids We'd survey the Milky Way To see just where it ends We'd travel at the speed of light In search for intelligent life I'd print lots more money Yeah, I'd print lots more money Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in Vote me in
5.	Sleepwalker 04:37	lyrics	buy track
On the lips The young widow's kiss is empty Then she smiles And she lights the fire of progress The law of falling bodies forgot you And all of deep space was a promise Sad talkers cut you down Sleepwalker, don't make a sound Ill wishers will bring us down Sleepwalker, don't make a sound Oh-oh, sleepwalker Oh, don't make a sound Oh-oh, sleepwalker The law of falling bodies forgot you But all of deep space was a lie Sad talkers cut you down Sleepwalker, don't make a sound Ill wishers will bring us down Sleepwalker… Oh-oh, sleepwalker Oh-oh, sleepwalker Oh-oh, I know too well human nature Sad talkers cut you down Sleepwalker, don't make a sound Ill wishers will bring us down Sleepwalker, don't make a sound
6.	Puny Soul 03:44	lyrics	buy track
Hello, my sweet little cloud Who makes up the sky? Oh-oh, and when you're so high Do you see we don't forever shine? I have decided I won't be told "No slice of heaven for your puny soul" I have decided that I'm in pain I would love to see you again No, no — No tattoos for me You are the chance I'll change my mind And, oh-oh, you are the hope For a brighter way to mark the passing time I have decided I won't be told "No slice of heaven for your puny soul" I have decided that I'm in pain How can I see you again? I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello Sweet, sweet, sweet tiny light Of course you are the missing hours of night But don't even think you're haunting me You're dead. And me? I have decided I won't be told "No slice of heaven for your puny soul" Are you delighted that I'm in pain? I would die to see you again Hello. Hello Hello. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello I wanna see you again. Hello And goodbye
7.	In Venus Fur 06:25	lyrics	buy track
I zip my ankle boots up Inside the storm of Susan I am suspended in a whirlwind She puts the Venus Fur on The higher heavens turn on I set my grip in her headwind Warm, soft and aching World is cruel outside So warm, soft and aching She is universal light She has the Venus Fur on Becomes the loss of reason I'd lose my meaning if I had one She comes in waves of purple Creates a sweet new chaos Kaleidoscope and perfume Warm, soft and aching World is cruel outside So warm, soft and aching She is universal light The Venus Fur The Venus Fur Warm, soft and aching She is my universal light The Venus Fur The Venus Fur Oh, you come true In Venus Fur
8.	Simon Says Be Sad 03:53	lyrics	buy track
The smell of love is on parade A perfume of promise The smell of love is on parade Again... I don't want to hear that blind man sing — Costume and flowers Songs are lies lifting the fight From the good people Don't tell me about love 'Cause my messy feelings won't love Simon says be sad And when Simon says be sad I'm sad, you're sad, we're sad With all the weirdos in the world And all our radical views — Subversive, perverted, political Who is safe with love? Don't tell me about love 'Cause my messy feelings won't love Simon says be sad And when Simon says be sad I'm sad, you're sad, we're sad It makes me sick to feel so sour But times like these are my better hours I've lost my hope And I'm afraid to believe I know I'm weak and I'm a coward I'd trade my eyes for honey power Or at least... At least to believe I want to believe I want to believe I want to believe
9.	The Future So Bright and Gold 02:32	lyrics	buy track
Forced into the faux paneling An inscription I had some trouble handling Hold me, hold me, hold me Hold me, enfold me Enfold me in your rubbery arms The future so bright and gold Has come and gone and left me Cold, cold and desperate I am shy You are shy, too shy My elevator etiquette suffers My elevator etiquette is slipping And the future so bright and gold Has come and gone and left me Cold, cold and desperate I am desperate Outside, inside, inside out There are 21 floors of scissors scrapes And paper cuts; a few simple steps To realize it's not enough And the future so bright and gold Has come and gone and left me PS — Warm regards
10.	Days of Suede 04:49	lyrics	buy track
I am a pirate You are less than treasure Is this adventure? Or is it even cool If I sail your empty sky? You are a mirror I am less than handsome Please bring it nearer Could this be love If a ghost is all that I can see? We sleep until noon in a dusty cocoon And we say, we say we've got it made We swallow the time like a blood-thirsty wine These are the days, the days of suede The days of suede The days of suede The days of suede The days of suede Oh, we've got it made I am an ulcer You're a glass of milk Questions are the answers To all my questions Still I thank you for all your sticky help We sleep until noon in a dusty cocoon And we say, we say we've got it made We swallow the time like blood-thirsty wine These are the days, the days of suede I am a spaceman Without an orbit I'd sell this tin can If I could afford it So I sail your empty sky We sleep until noon in a dusty cocoon We swallow the time like blood-thirsty wine We stare down the moon through the sunshades of doom And we say, we say we've got it made Oh, the days of suede

about

For some human expressions there is no divine time, no appointment with the zeitgeist, no cozy alignment with destiny. Most acquiesce to anonymity, fading into the cluttered graveyard of cultural ephemera. Others refuse to succumb, persisting on the margins, lurking like nagging, disjointed dreams, vampiric, resigned to the long night, taking death on the installment plan...

Initially united in spring 1990 as Darke County and trafficking in a brand of debonair Neo-Noir Americana, singer composer Jeffrey Bright, guitarist and arranger/composer Eric Schulz, bassist Chris Green, and drummer Christopher Fisher underwent a curious metamorphosis in summer 1991. Propelled by a sharper, edgier sound, more topically awake, mortally serious but shaded with surrealist humor, the foursome emerged as Myself a Living Torch and first performed at San Francisco’s Blue Lamp on Saturday, August 17 that year.

After recording a set of demos at Guerrilla Euphonics in Oakland and subsequently completing an EP at San Francisco’s Brilliant Studios — the self-released, 6-song Citizen Self — over the course of several months spanning 1992 and 1993 the band dove back into crafting new material and recording more demos, preparing for a full length follow up. Informed by the intensive, detailed work of making the Norman Kerner-produced EP at Brilliant and exploring the bounds of their updated art rock persona, what resulted were over 20 recordings that likely represent the best the quartet had to offer — yet were never heard outside the band’s closest circle.

Previously unreleased, distributed or marketed, these recordings were captured on 8-track tape in the band’s rehearsal room and home studio on Minna Street in what was then a raw, post-industrial sector of the San Francisco’s SOMA district. In 2020, during the novel coronavirus pandemic, the recordings were rescued from their original 1/4-inch tapes, restored, and in some cases finished with additional tracking. Now, 30 years from inception, roughly half of this material has been resurrected with Instant Karma Cannot Get Me.

Whereas their work prior to Citizen Self was in many ways an extension of Darke County’s quasi-kitsch shadow play, MaLT’s output after swaps that mid-century romanticism for a prickly, sardonic stance. The post-CS compositions rattle and roar with stubborn impertinence, at times soaring to anthemic heights, other times slithering on the floors of a particularly dystopian pathos. Obliquely political, profane, sweetly savage, perpetually, purposefully and obstinately outside its own time, but deeply rooted in its own geography, IKCGM is nothing less than a doomsday catalog presented in 10 swelling guitar symphonies — 10 cryptic voyages into the subconscious ocean/galaxy — surf music for an astral tsunami, speeding toward an unreachable, unknowable shore. Conjoined with its (forthcoming) sister LP, The Human Condition, Instant Karma Cannot Get Me can be seen as the zenith as well as the beginning of the subsequent phase-out of the project that was Myself a Living Torch. By mid-1994 the restless collective of Bright, Schulz, Green & Fisher had once again shed its skin to reveal yet another creature.

In all, MaLT’s three-year output reflects a perilous moment in the human arc: a period when love, romance and physical consummation were bedfellows with folly, when hope and the natural optimism of youth necessarily came wrapped in irony’s protective cloak. In the MaLT tableau, expressive guitar arrangements, trippy beats and distinctively tasteful bass figures, repeatedly set the stage for hyper-aware protagonists locked in conflict with a litany of existential snares. Seemingly, amidst the AIDS plague then still exacting a toll, all love is fatal and heartbreak inevitable. Here the question forever surfaces: Why even try at love? In response, shrines are erected to impermanence; the dreamer’s infinity is championed; ships are launched toward a horizon of liberation, fueled by an embrace of the feminine blue — erotic, titillating, beyond the bedroom, deeper than flesh, spiritual. With a stroke, however, monuments crumble and the ships shot down. Always, a gnawing feeling permeates. Arrows are aimed at so many policy failures — the detritus of the decade prior hamstrung by a myopic, fearful political and cultural conservatism: If the 1970s were years of unrepentant promiscuity, the 1980s were backlash, a period of constriction, correction and trepidation for social adventurers, tainting the luster of bohemian life in America's most bohemian city. By the early 1990s, the damage done was palpable. With the onset of the Internet boom in the mid-1990s, in many ways, San Francisco’s poetic age had come to an end, fin de siécle.

But, oh, the glamorous and melodramatic doom. Oh, the velvet ennui. Resistance is its own aphrodisiac. The underground always finds a way. Art will be rendered. Statements must be made. Spirit prevails where the vessel fails. Instant karma cannot get me; I’ve already been had!

Ultimately, all flames extinguish, some too intense to last. But the music created by Myself a Living Torch between summer 1991 and fall 1993 will continue to smolder. Fittingly, Instant Karma Cannot Get Me closes on a defiant (if wistful and fully self-conscious) note, one emblematic and precisely defining MaLT’s insistence that one’s journey to the edge of existence is ever more important than what will be found, if indeed there is anything there at all.

“We sleep until noon in a dusty cocoon / We swallow the time like a bloodthirsty wine / We stare down the moon through the sunshades of doom / And we say we’ve got it made.”

credits

released June 4, 2021

voice + guitar – jeffrey bright
guitars – eric schulz
string bass + bass guitars – chris green
drums – christopher fisher

additional tracks – jeffrey bright

words – bright
music – bright & schulz

initial recording:
produced by myself a living torch
engineered by eric schulz
the minna mansion
san francisco, california
1992–1993

tape transfer:
tardon feathered / mr. toad's
richmond, california
2020

restoration, editing, additional recording,
mixing, mastering:
studio la casa
san francisco, california
2018–2021

cover photo + design – jeffrey bright
artist unknown

c / 1992–1993 Myself a Living Torch
p / 2021 JABMA
Fugitive Music Publishing / BMI

license

about

Myself a Living Torch San Francisco, California

By turns surreal, beautiful, arch, and melancholic, MaLT’s sonic adventures explore the meaning of love and role of sex in a failing, depersonalized culture. Literate enough for lasting relevance, tuneful enough for disposable pop; dark, sometimes heavy, but always with sly humor and a dash of hope. Active in SF CA between 1991 and 1993 ... Credit Louis-Ferdinand Céline for the incendiary name. ... more

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